Previous articles and blogs have focused on the challenges black couples must overcome to have a harmonious and satisfying marriage but this article will focus on the power of a certain population of marriages, Christian couples and more specifically Christian couples of color. It is important for this demographic to understand the influence they have in children, families, their community, and church. It is not enough to say that you are a “Christian” and to think this makes you a match for your partner, but you should make sure you are compatible with a Christian partner. In other words, two Christians do not necessarily make a match. Having God as the center of your marriage means more than the ability to pray together, but it means being able to overcome the challenges that families face with finances, raising children, health crisis, and even spiritual warfare.
To describe the unification and oneness of a marriage, I use the analogy of a hot cup of coffee with cream, if you cannot separate the cream from the coffee, you should not be able to separate a marriage. Coffee may be good alone, but the right cream added to the coffee gives it a new flavor. If whipped cream is added, the coffee now becomes a different drink altogether, much like a Christian couple. Anyone can get a marriage license. Anyone can live together. But it takes work to keep Christ as the center of your marriage. Although there is power in numbers, there is a greater power in oneness when it comes to marriage.
Why, you may ask, do I specify “color”? African Americans have many obstacles to overcome without marriage being a factor. When individuals are compatible, Christians and they join forces they can be a power couple. God is much too great to “settle” in a marriage. Do not look for a spouse to make you happy, know what you want and seek your own happiness within and bring that to the marriage. Many people struggle with childhood issues, mommy, or daddy problems, it’s important to work those burdens out before marriage or at least be aware of your emotional weights.
Celebrities should not be the only power couples of color that the world should see as an example. Everyday Christian couples of color need to be the billboard of happy and satisfying marriages and borrow some very simple advice from the most famous iconic couple in the world President Barack and Michelle Obama: make sure your family is whole as a priority, marriage counseling, and do the work.